When you come to me for help, I want to help you.
I hope you will let me.
I cannot know your secrets without your words.
I hope you will tell me.
Tell me, please, your thoughts of suicide.
You might feel scared to tell me
When I ask if you are thinking of suicide.
I will try to help you feel safe.
I will not judge you.
I will not interrogate you.
I will not panic.
I will listen gently as you tell your story
In your own words, in your own way.
Suicide might tell you not to tell me.
Suicide might tell you I am your enemy.
Suicide lies.
Suicide might tell you that nobody could possibly help you,
That dying is the only way to end your pain.
Suicide might even tell you that you are a bad person
Defective, undeserving of life
Or love, or hope, or compassion.
Please, tell me.
I cannot help you fight the enemy
If you do not tell me about the enemy,
The enemy that is trying to kill you.
Do not trust your suicidal thoughts.
They are not rational.
They are a symptom, a sign, a cry from inside.
Something inside you needs healing.
Healing, not killing.
Tell me, please, what suicide tells you.
Does it tell you everything that is wrong with your life?
Everything that is wrong with you?
Suicide plays tricks with truth,
Telling only the truths that make you want to die
Hiding the truths that make you want to live.
The pieces of hope.
The pathways to healing.
The possible.
Tell me, please.
Or tell somebody else.
I am only one of many people who can help you.
But nobody can help you if you tell nobody.
Thank you.
One day you will thank you, too.
For telling.
For surviving.
***
© Copyright 2014 Stacey Freedenthal, PhD, LCSW, All Rights Reserved. Written for www.speakingofsuicide.com. Photos purchased from Fotolia.com.
I have been principled all my life. I am overly gifted in all things. I have only abuse and slavery for my troubles . for years i’ve heard thé same words over and over , be patient have faith it will change.
Simple pleasantries for childrens ears.
There is no truth in faith.
Patience guarantees that life will pass you by.
How do i feel?
With my hands.
I have no feeling for feelings.
I have no désire to feel yet more pain.
My life has already ended twenty years ago.
Simply existing hurts.
I should not have been so thoughtless as to prove thé good doctors wrong in coming back to life eight hours after they declared me dead, how dare i not be dead, they are thé experts , not you.
No it wasn’t suicide, i was at work earning money i did not need with no thoughts of ending it.
My life was declared over nonetheless.
I should have had thé good grâce to be as thé doctors declared.
Who on earth wants this?
Why suffer ?
Help
You write very well. I agree, being patient does guarantee life will pass by. I came to this site because a friend of mine jumped from a fifth floor. Somehow she’s alive, and is now dealing with everything else that comes with the attempt. I didn’t know what to write to her, so I ended up in this site from many others. But your words resonated in me. See before, I would have never thought she would be one to have such feelings, now I know they can happen to anyone, even the best of people. At times in my life I have felt what you mention about life passing by, but if we know passing by is not living, may I ask, what are those things that make you feel with your heart, rather than with your hands? I ask, because for me, the dark feelings quiet down the more I spend time doing the things that make my heart feel.
I been depressed for almost now 3 years and it’s one of those ups and downs moments.I haven’t told anyone on how I feel until now and I just dont know if I want to continue. I have been sexually harassed as a child and it haunt me everytime on how scared I was. Sometimes I blame everything on myself and ask myself why I’m even living I used to have a lot of suicide thoughts but I tried my best to stop and I did self harm during the 2 years I got depressed but now I’m trying to not do it because I’m tired of hiding it. I wish I could tell someone how I feel and get it out my chest. It’s very hard for me to tell how I feel to others it was not that long ago that I told my mother that I was sexually harassed. It was very hard to even say it to her I wish I could change the past. I don’t want to commit suicide because I don’t want to be selfish and want others to deal with my consequences but I’m tired everyday and stress on everything it is very hard to continue going and don’t know what to do. My parents don’t know what I’m dealing with don’t want them to know since it’s already too much for them to bare with. I know that I am not fine but I don’t have a choice. I can’t get help and I don’t want help. I don’t know what I’m going to do in life I’m scared and know that I will struggle to be successful and been put through so much hard work. I I know I have good grades but I just think I’m stupid and can’t don’t anything right. have failed life but I want to get better but I don’t know how.
Hello dear I read your comment and I want you to know that you have said enough for someone to help although you say you don’t want help. Things can get hard and I truly do not know your story but like you I have gone through many trials and tribulations and have come clear out on the other side. If you want to talk I’ll leave my email… don’t hesitate. river4sadie@gmail.com
Yours truly.
I just want to die plane and simple I’m never happy alone I just don’t know
Nearly 35 years and still waiting for me to thank myself.
im 22, turning 23 soon, im from Malaysia so wat im experiencing may different from most of the comments here
i just realize i might be suffering from depression this couple weeks, although the symptoms appeared almost few months ago. i done some research and read through comments in this site. i didnt had this problem for long so i cant imagine how other people in the comment section are feeling or the hardship they went through. im scared that my condition will get worse. im thinking of killing myself for the past week, but too scared to do so.
im feeling so sad and down, im graduating from university soon, real soon, but my supervisor is giving me a hard time, he is racist and treat me horribly. sometimes i just feel like exploding and argue with him but my results is in his hand, and im so close to graduating. im kinda the “smarter one” among my bro and sis, so my parents always expect alot from me all these years, i cant fail them now just because my supervisor treats me badly. i know my situation sound not very serious and childish at some point, but my emotion is getting worse that it scares me. my roomate, who is also my best friend has finish up his thesis and went home, im alone in my room i cry everyday, i didnt eat cuz i dont feel like eating, even tho im hungry. i would cry so loud and scream in my pillow cuz i dont wan to disturb people next door, at some point i cry so hard i suddenly turns to laughing loudly. this scares me so much, i think im going crazy, im not even sure wat symptoms im having anymore.
i just cant bring myself to tell my parents, i think my best friend noticed im getting very emotional but i dont think he knows im very close to killing myself right now.
i fell in love with a girl before, a year younger than me, but i was too scared and no confident to ask her out(i had some bad experience before) so i just watch from afar. but couple months back i learnt that she is dating my best friend(the roomate i mentioned), i cant even describe how i felt. i dont blame him, since i never told anyone my feeling, but the true pain is when he would ask me to join them for dinner, go for movie and many things, the 3 of us knows each other very well so it seems like a normal “hang out” thing for him to do but to me it is hell. i know i have to give up on her but meeting her almost everyday like this isnt helping. then one day i found someone special, someone that actually able to get tat girl out of my mind. i actually feel happy, stressfree when she is around me. tat was the perfect chance for me to move on, this time i wont make the same mistake again, so i confess to her. but i was rejected. she is a nice girl, she keep saying sorry to me after rejecting me.
i have many other problems but i dont feel like sharing it here.i dont have any major problem that cause my depression, actually i dont even know why i have depression, i just starts to feel all those horrible emotion and realize something is wrong, after doing research only i know i maybe suffering from depression and suicidal thought. all these little memories are coming back to haunt me everyday. im thinking of kill myself but im scared, im scared of death, im scared of pain, but i just wan to get out of here, im tired, so tired of everything.
i feel terrible, everyone in the world just wanted to fck up my life
I think i need help